Is there a company that makes an effects loop snake? Hosa makes regular insert type snakes (quarter inch to quarter inch) but I don't think they make one with only 2 cables in it. My google is weak....
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There might be, but it wouldn't be too practical for a company to bother making a snake for just two cables. Just use a cable tidy like I posted, if anything that's better, because you can stick more cables in it later on if you so wish.
Seriously dude, I would probably just find something and make your own. If you want something that looks neat, could try getting some kind of mesh material similar to what they use on PC power supplies:
Best pic I could find, but you get the idea, some kind of nylon mesh type material. The quick and dirty way is what I posted. I've done it before with MIDI/power going to my Behringer FCB1010, before I snagged a Ground Control Pro with phantom power. Doesn't look neat but it gets the job done and is cheap.
I think this is the way to go. After pricing out what I'd need at pedalsnake the grand total was a little over $100. Not worth it for tone suckage. After looking up "dual patch cable" at GC (yuck) it showed exactly what I need minus the angled ends.