Movies That Suck and Why

[Daemoniac]

Every Saw film after the first. Hell, even the first to an extent. Way to milk the cash cow and lose all trace of intelligent story twists, and way to drag out a story 5 movies too long

The Informant. Saw it advertised at the movies, it actually looked pretty funny. Borrowed it out, slowest, most boring hour of my life (i only watched an hour. I couldn't stand it any longer than that)

Prince of Persia. Piece of shit. Assassins creed-meets-The Scorpion King-Meets-Aladdin with all of Disney's token cheeseball acting, horrible plot butchering, lack of anything resembling good storytelling/acting, and awful pace.

Species. All of them. I really don't think these need any explanation at all, just fucking awful

Scream/I Know What You Did Last Summer/Jeepers Creepers/insert other "teen horror" movie here. Fuck-awful acting, nonexistant plot, nonexistant character development, disgusting dialog all wrapped up in one giant ball of shit.

The Punisher. What the fuck was this? Seriously? Just awful.

There are more... I just can't think of them

 

[Marv Attaxx]

Species. All of them. I really don't think these need any explanation at all, just fucking awful

Scream/I Know What You Did Last Summer/Jeepers Creepers/insert other "teen horror" movie here. Fuck-awful acting, nonexistant plot, nonexistant character development, disgusting dialog all wrapped up in one giant ball of shit.

I love those

 

[Daemoniac]

Bah, each to their own for preference I suppose , but I definitely think they're badly made movies

 

[Xaios]

Yesterday I watched "House of the dead" by Uwe Boll.

Uwe Boll's movies are "enter at your own peril." I thought by now EVERYONE knew they were completely awful.

Scream/I Know What You Did Last Summer/Jeepers Creepers/insert other "teen horror" movie here. Fuck-awful acting, nonexistant plot, nonexistant character development, disgusting dialog all wrapped up in one giant ball of shit.

I agree with every movie in this list. HOWEVER, I will say Jeepers Creepers at least had potential. The setup was creepy as hell and very effective. The problem was the reveal was a huge letdown and everything after that sucked.

 

[Marv Attaxx]

Bah, each to their own for preference I suppose , but I definitely think they're badly made movies

I love watching a trashy movie once in a while
Sure, they're badly made but sometimes those teen-horror movies are fun to watch.
Species is a different story: watched those movies when I was a child and it was kinda hot back than

 

[Choop]

Alice in Wonderland (johnny depp version):
I just recently saw this, and I have to say for a movie that appeared to have a unique sense of style, it ended up being one of the most generic pieces of garbage I've ever seen. Dialogue, characters, plot...all awful. All of these things sucking aside, the movie really lacks focus. It felt like it was trying to be many different things at once, but never doing anything particularly well. Alice is the chosen one to slay the evil beast, where has this been done before? Why does Alice have to slay an evil beast? Alice in Wonderland is supposed to be about a quirky world, and about problem solving in absurd situations. It's not supposed to be about the one who kills the dragon against all odds (although that may be pretty absurd in itself). It felt like The Lion, Witch, and the Wardrobe, with LotR, with Harry Potter, etcetcetc. They just went with this same tired formula for a movie that had potential to be great.
It seems like everything that was great about Alice in Wonderland was forgotten. There is a very generic formula, with occasional references to the source material ever so often to keep it just relevant enough to let it get away with the title. Johnny Depp couldn't even save the movie, despite being a pretty good actor his vapid and boring character fit right in with all of the other drooling shallow characters. I never felt convinced that the Mad Hatter was actually mad, and that's a problem. >:[

/rant about a kids movie

 

[pink freud]

Alice in Wonderland (johnny depp version):
I just recently saw this, and I have to say for a movie that appeared to have a unique sense of style, it ended up being one of the most generic pieces of garbage I've ever seen. Dialogue, characters, plot...all awful. All of these things sucking aside, the movie really lacks focus. It felt like it was trying to be many different things at once, but never doing anything particularly well. Alice is the chosen one to slay the evil beast, where has this been done before? Why does Alice have to slay an evil beast? Alice in Wonderland is supposed to be about a quirky world, and about problem solving in absurd situations. It's not supposed to be about the one who kills the dragon against all odds (although that may be pretty absurd in itself). It felt like The Lion, Witch, and the Wardrobe, with LotR, with Harry Potter, etcetcetc. They just went with this same tired formula for a movie that had potential to be great.
It seems like everything that was great about Alice in Wonderland was forgotten. There is a very generic formula, with occasional references to the source material ever so often to keep it just relevant enough to let it get away with the title. Johnny Depp couldn't even save the movie, despite being a pretty good actor his vapid and boring character fit right in with all of the other drooling shallow characters. I never felt convinced that the Mad Hatter was actually mad, and that's a problem. >:[

/rant about a kids movie

 

[Choop]

hahahahahah!!! Wow, I've never seen that. Thank you. :V

 

[Excalibur]

Nice.

 

[ShadyDavey]

Species. All of them. I really don't think these need any explanation at all, just fucking awful

Yes. Except...

Natasha Hentsridge. You know it

 

[Variant]

Prince of Persia. Piece of shit. Assassins creed-meets-The Scorpion King-Meets-Aladdin with all of Disney's token cheeseball acting, horrible plot butchering, lack of anything resembling good storytelling/acting, and awful pace.

Shit, I was hoping that this would be at least passable (but suspecting that it probably wouldn't), as I'm a huge fan of the games... especially the first one which was an utterly fantastic piece.

 

[Daemoniac]

Shit, I was hoping that this would be at least passable (but suspecting that it probably wouldn't), as I'm a huge fan of the games... especially the first one which was an utterly fantastic piece.

I never played the games that much, but enough to roughly know the plot and more than enough to know the amazing character designs and style of the worlds, and this just destroyed it

It's the kind of movie you'd put on for the kids, have on in the background, and just look over to have a chuckle every now and then, but it's not a good movie at all

 

[shredfreak]

Anything made by Uwe boll basicly.

Everything after Hellraiser 2 ... 3 goes down the american slasher gore path, 4 is acceptable but then ... I never got the finish inferno due to it's epic boredom & the rest is unacceptable at best, still went through the horror of actually trying to watch some of it.

Can't say i understand all the hype around tarantino either, tried to watch some of his movies & though they were epic shit.

 

[cyberwaste6996]

Uwe Boll's movies are "enter at your own peril." I thought by now EVERYONE knew they were completely awful.

Agreed, yet someone keeps giving him money to make more movies.

 

[shredfreak]

Agreed, yet someone keeps giving him money to make more movies.

I've always wondered how this is possible actually, I honestly don't get how a director can keep making movies if each one of them is more miserable then the one before

 

[AVWIII]

My least favourite movies of all time would be:
Rent.
Who takes this seriously? I realize it's a musical, but the characters are weak stereotypes and the music is horrid (I'm not saying this because it's "not metal", the music is actually garbage.). I watched it on a bus ride full of musical theatre students. I've never been more of an asshole than while I watched that movie. They told me I didn't need any more enemies on the bus. Didn't know I had any in the first place. Fuck you, Rent.

Starship troopers III
I'll take some of the blame for this one. I never saw the second one, but I was with a friend who got his mind blown by the fact that casper van something was back. I'll admit I loved the first movie, but I knew this was gonna be horrible.
Take starship troopers, cut all the likeable characters, spend 3/4 of the movie in low budget sets and not showing any aliens, tack on a religious message ("I've got religion. I've got it bad." - some character wrapped in a virgin mary-esque head scarf.), 25 seconds of useless tits, even less time for some bad CG robots, and we've got a movie.

I've never disliked movies more.
I liked twilight more than these movies.

 

[cyberwaste6996]

I've always wondered how this is possible actually, I honestly don't get how a director can keep making movies if each one of them is more miserable then the one before

I have a theory...Movie companies give him a little money to make his bad movies so it'll make the rest of their movies look better by comparison and they might bring in more money...Just a thought.

 

[groph]

lol @ the person who neg repped me

 

[groph]

Not a word about Terminator Salvation? Wow.

The future.... Skynet has blown most of the human race off the face of the planet and is engaged in a campaign to hunt down and eradicate the survivors. What does it do? Build huge robot armies and undertake total war?

Fuck no.

It builds androids with the intelligence of the average vehicle assembly unit that will stand under falling grand pianos. It builds supposedly intelligent bikes that allow themselves to be ridden by their worst enemy and have USB ports to help them do it. It builds an Arniedroid that slaps around its prime target instead of putting its hand into his chest and ripping his fucking heart out. Always assuming that the Terminator they already set off on his trail hadn't just followed its programming and killed John Connor off the minute it clapped its eyes on him.

This happens in between the most pointless action scenes in the history of filmmaking occuring approximately every eight minutes throughout the 'film' and lasting approximately seven minutes and thirty seconds each, obviously under the assumption that this would counteract the Ritalin its target audience obviously needs to be on. The remaining thirty seconds of each 8-minute 'act' (something that doesn't happen in this film) is involved with briefly meeting Mrs John Connor (dunno why) and listening to Christian Bale's pisspoor imitation of Barry White imitating Batman.

Aside from that, I really enjoyed this film and would recommend it to any attention-deficient masochist.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA


Yeah, that movie isn't all that great when you take into account the plotholes and the fact that Skynet seems to be rather awful at eradicating the human race. I really liked it, but I'm a sucker for killer robots. It's not a "good" movie but I found it entertaining. At least Mrs John Connor is righteously attractive. I've seen this movie five times in theatres.

My biggest gripe is that damn guy who played Marcus Wright (or JAKESULLY FROM CLAN JARHEAD LOLOL) and his inconsistent accent. He sounds nearly Australian in parts. That guy doesn't seem to be a competent actor at all.

 

[Murmel]

The only 2 scenes I remember from Terminator: Salvation is where Arnold is naked lol
And when the giant robot thingy crushes a SAAB trying to escape. When that happened I said to my buddy; "That's what happens if you drive a SAAB..." He laughed so much that the entire theatre was staring at him.