I tried to watch The Boondock Saints last night. It was really bad.
Movies That Suck and Why
- Thread starter groph
- Start date
This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links like Ebay, Amazon, and others.
This site may earn a commission from merchant links like Ebay, Amazon, and others.
Alas, sounds like the reasons you disliked it are the very reasons I loved it. When there was action, there was LOTS of action, but I always thought the lead-up to said action was wonderful as well. The tension in the first scene alone was amazing.
I agree completely. Fantastic movie.
I went in expecting a typical, mindless, Tarantino-style gore fest, but was really surprised. In a good way of course.
Admittedly of course, I could have easily gone for more Donowitz (Roth) baseball bat flurries and Stiglitz (Schweiger) knifing, but it didn't ruin the movie for me.
EDIT: Fixed grammar.
Just out of curiosity, which of his movies are like this?
I meant Tarantino styled gore fest (you can't tell me he doesn't love blood sometimes). I wasn't implying that all his movies are mindless either.
I said typical in reference to what action movies are these days, just shoot'em up blood and guts. Nothing wrong with it, it was just nice to see this movie was different than I, and many, thought it was going to be.
Not hating on Tarantino.
josh pelican
Banned
Geoff (groph) only likes Starship Troopers.
Krankguitarist
Well-Known Member
Thus a movie I saw when I was in Junior High, said "OMG so much action, aliens invading and tits awesom3!!!1!!1one!"
Saw it again a few years later, said "Fuck, this movie's all cheese, fuck this".
Saw it again a few years later: "Oh! It's a satire! I get it now! And tits! Awesom3!!!!!1!!121!!!one!"
Zodiac - A movie about the true story of the Zodiac serial killer who went on his spree in the late 60's. The movie had a 2 hour running time roughly, which meant it was about 1 hour and 59 minutes too long. Despite the fairly good cast (Robert Downy ftw!) it just seemed to end... and then carry on. Again and again. It summarized, wrapped up, crescendo'd.... THEN CONTINUED! OVER AND OVER! It was like a reoccurring nightmare With no substance!
You, sir, win at life
I can't believe that the boy (Jake Lloyd) who played Anakin in Episide I was slashed by critics, and dubbed "Mannequin Skywalker" (great pun, though!) for his acting... HE WAS 9!! Yet nobody mention Hayden Chrstiansen's diabolical tirade that reigned bullshit on the films that are my life From his first appearance to the teeth-grindingly awkward final scene, he was just fucking shit through and through.
I know Lucas has a penchant for picking fairly undiscovered actors but c'moooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!!!!!!
With no substance!You, sir, win at life
I can't believe that the boy (Jake Lloyd) who played Anakin in Episide I was slashed by critics, and dubbed "Mannequin Skywalker" (great pun, though!) for his acting... HE WAS 9!! Yet nobody mention Hayden Chrstiansen's diabolical tirade that reigned bullshit on the films that are my life
From his first appearance to the teeth-grindingly awkward final scene, he was just fucking shit through and through.I know Lucas has a penchant for picking fairly undiscovered actors but c'moooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!!!!!!
Juno was crap.
The pretentious indie-folk made me rage. "Monkey on the back is the latest thing"
And what the hell is up with the whole "And it ended with a chair" thing?
Adulthood was another shit film. Go away Plan B, you cannot act.
The pretentious indie-folk made me rage. "Monkey on the back is the latest thing"
And what the hell is up with the whole "And it ended with a chair" thing?
Adulthood was another shit film. Go away Plan B, you cannot act.
synrgy
Ya ya ya I am Lorde
I know Lucas has a penchant for picking fairly undiscovered actors but c'moooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!!!!!!
Funny.. I thought his penchant was for writing God-awful dialog.
josh pelican
Banned
The Blair Witch Project.
"OMG JOSH!"
*guy standing in corner*
End movie.
"OMG JOSH!"
*guy standing in corner*
End movie.
groph
Well-Known Member
Same, I figured it'd be good like Reservoir Dogs or something. Oddly, Reservoir Dogs is the only Tarantino movie I've seen that I've thoroughly enjoyed. I didn't care for the style of Basterds at all. It did have a few good points, though. The Bear Jew scene where the dude gets beaten to death with a bat is difficult to watch (I've seen the part in Irreversible where a guy gets killed with a fire extinguisher, I know that's worse), and the guy playing the German officer (Landa?) is a fucking fantastic actor.
Have you any idea how many movies have been made?
Pretty much this.
I've seen a few shitty movies recently so I'll add some more.
The Cube - This could have been really cool. The concept is awesome but the entire movie is wrecked by the horrifically over the top acting. The plot is pretty foggy too, nothing is really explained. Apparently the sequels are better so I'll give them a shot. This movie fucking sucked, though.
Pandorum - The gore and shit is cool, and the little mutant kid is creepy as fuck but that's about it. Muddy plot, nothing really new.
The Other Guys - WILL FARREL PLAYS THE SAME FUCKING CHARACTER IN EVERY FUCKING MOVIE.
Example of a typical "comedic" scene involving Will.
-Will in a social situation
-Something the audience is supposed to percieve as funny happens
-Will begins to explain literally what just happened
-Will points out the awkwardness in said event
-Will continues to elaborate about how awkward the "funny" event was
-People start leaving
-Will comments on the people leaving, saying that they are leaving.
Mark Wahlberg fits into this movie like a Jew in an auction (neg rep me when you're done laughing). He's alright in movies where he's allowed to be an asshole, and his being a dick is not meant to be funny. He's a "serious movie" actor. Pretty much everything he says is at least twice as loud as what Will says, and is completely inappropriate.
Example.
Mark - Did you play Cops and Robbers as a kid?
Will - Geoff doesn't remember everything I said, but I gave my parents an audit when I was eight
Mark (yelling) - WHO ARE YOU?
Mark's character eliminates the tiny chance of Will being funny by overstating how funny the scenes are supposed to be. I wouldn't recommend ever exchanging jokes with the whoever wrote Mark's lines if you ever come across him. There was one funny part in the movie, and this is speaking in relative terms. If this funny part were in a greater comedy, it would be a lesser joke by far. Actually the hobos who used Will's car as an "F-shack" (they snuck in and had orgies) or whatever was kind of funny too, even though I never knew hobos were known for having group sex in abandoned cars.
Aliens Vs Predator: Requiem - If this movie wasn't entirely fucking righteous it would suck so terribly. Luckily, the completely predictable plot is cancelled out by a girl getting pinned to a wall with a massive shuriken, a nursery full of babies getting massacred by xenomorphs, Predaliens, Xenomorphs, Predators, unjustified nuclear detonations, a father and son getting the facehugger treatment, a girl's father getting gruesomely killed before her eyes, and a pregnant woman having her unborn children twisted and mutated into ravenous xenomorph offspring. This movie certainly goes really, really far for a theater release. If you can laugh at abortions, you could probably stomach this movie. In fair, objective terms, this movie is an abomination. But because it's an abomination, it's awesome. So in my opinion it's really good, but in "their" opinion it's inhumanely terrible.
EDIT: OH OH I REMEMBERED ANOTHER ONE
Live! - it involves a television production team trying to get a game show based on Russian Roulette on the air. Eva Mendes is in it. This movie is fucking retarded. They basically just have six participants and a gun with one bullet in it (or there might be multiple guns with any number of bullets, this is the biggest plothole - the show is obviously rigged. Unless they explained it in the movie, I must have missed that part) and they pass the gun around, pulling the trigger. If they don't die, they win $5 million. Imagine how exciting that must be. OH WOW THE FIRST PERSON TO PUT THE GUN TO HIS HEAD DIDN'T DIE! OH SHIT NEITHER DID THE SECOND ONE! FUCK THE THIRD ONE LIVED TOO! I WONDER WHO IS GOING TO DIE!
You know, I actually enjoyed Will Farrell in Stranger Than Fiction. He succeeded in the playing the "innocuous nice guy" type character that Ben Stiller has failed at played so... many... timeshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Along_Came_Polly. Also, the scene in the guitar store in that movie just killed me, it was just dead on.
Will Farrell looks at Les Paul w/ floral paint job.
Narrator: Unfortunately, THIS guitar said, 'When I get back to Georgia, that woman gonna feel my pain.'
Will Farrell looks at Flying V:
Narrator: THIS one said something along the lines of, 'Why yes, these pants ARE lycra.'
Will Farrell looks at acoustic guitars:
Narrator: THESE said, 'I'm very sensitive, very caring, and I have absolutely no idea how to play the guitar.'
I also enjoyed him in Talledega Nights. He was almost as unhinged as he is in nearly every other movie (but not quite), but he's also drawn finely enough as a character that we understand him a bit more, as opposed to him just being all out silliness like in most of his movies.
mhickman2
The Abiding Dude
Boondock saints 2. I hoped for them to do a sequel
for years. This was the best troy duffy could do? About as disappointing as an unrelieved boner.
for years. This was the best troy duffy could do? About as disappointing as an unrelieved boner.
Law Abiding Citizen.
An ok film for the first half an hour. A great one, in fact. But then the characters just become all loose-ended and nondescript. Character dynamic is one of the most important things in films, and if you ain't got it - neither does your script.
Jamie Fox playing an attorney, who runs around with a gun, solving crimes with the police? Police, might I add, that don't bat a fucking eye-lid when they are accompanied BY AN ARMED ATTORNEY! It's just retarded and really unfathomable. If he had been played as some stress-ridden guy who worked on the side-lines as it slowly ate him and his personal life away then sure, I'd dig it. But c'mon. Judge Judy cannot be Action Man as well 
An ok film for the first half an hour. A great one, in fact. But then the characters just become all loose-ended and nondescript. Character dynamic is one of the most important things in films, and if you ain't got it - neither does your script.
Jamie Fox playing an attorney, who runs around with a gun, solving crimes with the police? Police, might I add, that don't bat a fucking eye-lid when they are accompanied BY AN ARMED ATTORNEY!
It's just retarded and really unfathomable. If he had been played as some stress-ridden guy who worked on the side-lines as it slowly ate him and his personal life away then sure, I'd dig it. But c'mon. Judge Judy cannot be Action Man as well LOL holy shit! 
kung_fu
Vulcan Lute God
Nice thread!
I'm sure i'll think of more, but one movie i find extremely overrated is "Reality Bites". First of all, i hated every character in this movie, strange since i'm supposed to identify with them. Ethan Hawke's arty/bullshitty character is just unintentionally hilarious. And why am i supposed to feel bad that Janeane Garofalo may or may not have aids ?(she kept a diary of all the guys she's fucked). I get what they were going for, but to me it seems like they were trying to cover too many Gen X issues in the same movie and as a result it just seems forced.
I'm sure i'll think of more, but one movie i find extremely overrated is "Reality Bites". First of all, i hated every character in this movie, strange since i'm supposed to identify with them. Ethan Hawke's arty/bullshitty character is just unintentionally hilarious. And why am i supposed to feel bad that Janeane Garofalo may or may not have aids ?(she kept a diary of all the guys she's fucked). I get what they were going for, but to me it seems like they were trying to cover too many Gen X issues in the same movie and as a result it just seems forced.
kung_fu
Vulcan Lute God
Oh, and the wayans brothers need to stop making movies as well. Is it wrong that i'd rather watch a Keenan-Ivory Wayans action flick than one of his comedies? I loved watching the Damon Wayans movies growing up, but there are just too many wayans brothers and not enough of them are funny. The Doctor should sew Mrs Wayans' vagina shut.
