The Rules Of Metal

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Regor

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Chris said:
*administers the fred durst shredding video to Dark Wolf*

Poser. Manowar would scowl at you. ;)

You know... am I the only person that 'got' what Fred Durst was doind in that video??

Did anyone else see the link to Spinal Tap in that??
 

Toshiro

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HateBreeder said:
Thats like trying to cancel someone by hitting them with a rubber chicken ;p
*administers Exodus' Fabulous Disaster album*

hahahahahahaha Now that's funny. :agreed:
 

Shawn

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HateBreeder said:
Thats like trying to cancel someone by hitting them with a rubber chicken ;p
*administers Exodus' Fabulous Disaster album*
While your at it...why not ACT III Death Angel. :metal:
I've been yearning for that.
*administers Sacred Reich's American Way*
Killer. :metal:
 

wolfsd

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Flobanez said:
While your at it...why not ACT III Death Angel. :metal:
I've been yearning for that.
*administers Sacred Reich's American Way*
Killer. :metal:

I'm not the only one that liked that one?????.....hey now it's a Johnny, hanging by his neck.................but really, who's to blame?

I will now administer Ripping Corpse's Dreaming with the Dead
 

ecalcagnino

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Man, I was listening to Sirius today and Sacred Reich came on. I haven't heard that in forever, it was ultimate :scream:

Act III was a good disc, too. Wasn't the drummer like 16 on that one or something? We administered a couple of those tunes and a couple from Frolic Through the Park to fill out some set lists WAY back in the day. That was true.

Speaking of Violence, anyone else like those guys? They were pretty ultimate, too.
 

wolfsd

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Okay now.....I'm going to get all teary eyed here as we go down the road of memories....

Vio-lence, Whiplash, Atrophy, Dark Angel, Hallows Eve, Annihilator, Anthrax, Bad Brains, Confessor.....*Sigh*, looks like I'm going to waste the rest of the day listening to some old friends........At least I will be getting back in touch with some of my roots...

*Administers Whiplash's Insult To Injury*
Now.....where did I put those damn picks.......
 

Regor

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Correct me if i'm wrong... cuz I don't know anything about Vio-lence. But wasn't that, like, Rob Flynn from Machine Head's old band? I know Phil Dremmel, the new guitarist in MH, was from Vio-lence.
 

ecalcagnino

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Sure is. Man I miss those guys. Vio-Lence, Forbidden and a couple others mentioned here were so overlooked, it's a total shame.

Man, wolfsd, we should compare collections, my thrash bro! \mm/ Awesome, that's the first time I saw all those names put on one page since my high school notebook covers...heh.. :hbang:
 

Shawn

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I remember Frolic Through The Park. Awesome.:yesway:
Vio-Lence's Opressing The Masses is good.
Im going to administer Obituary's Cause Of Death. James Murphy is awesome.:hbang:
 

jski7

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Flobanez said:
While your at it...why not ACT III Death Angel. :metal:
I've been yearning for that.
*administers Sacred Reich's American Way*
Killer. :metal:
Mmmm , Death Angel - Seemingly Endless Time . Bad as fuck :metal: .
Sacred Reich , Forbidden . I'd almost completely forgotten about those days way back when . I'm going to procure some of these guys on cd and administer without delay !
 

ecalcagnino

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I love on Oppressing the Masses you can hear the kick pedal squeaking. Just awesome. That guy has the fastest fills I have ever heard. Sick!
 

Shawn

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Sepultura-Beneath The Remains should be a good one to administer.
 

ecalcagnino

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If you guys are interested, here is some stuff I administered about 13 years ago. All original, all me except drums. These were pre-vox demos for our Roadracer signing that happened then died almost as quick heh... nice! It's thrashy and Testament-ish or something...

http://www.prankmonki.com/alchemist/

We got to play with a lot of cool bands and because we were based in Milwaukee we were always involved with Metalfest if any of you are familiar with it.

I was writing this stuff when I was 16-19 and I recorded these in 1993 at the ripe old age of 20.
 

dan5150

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Bringing the discussion back from reminising about the old days....

I have had this posted on the wall above my amp for a few years now.
I will also be the first to admit that I am in violation of a few of them.

Allow me to administer the supreme "Rules of Rock". :metal:


RULES OF ROCK​
For anyone in a band or anyone who wants to be in a band

1.) Don't misspell any words in your band's name. Many bands opt to switch the letter "I" for the letter "y". This is cool if you're into everyone with 1/8 to 1/16 a brain assuming that you are a crappy jock/rap/metal band. For instance, Limp Bizkit, Strait Up, and Korn are all these type of bands. Are any of them good? Check and mate.
2.) Avoid using food products in your band's name. Chances are you'll misspell it anyways. Also chances are you'll pick some crappy food over a tasty one.
3.) Don't wear your band's own shirts. No exceptions or excuses accepted. Don't think the "but I'm on tour and we haven't been able to wash our clothes, it's the only thing clean I had to wear" story is gonna fly...wear the dirty shirt, you're a rocker my friend.
4.) Don't play reggae unless you are in Bad Brains.
5.) Cowboy hats are for cowboys only. That is why they are called cowboy hats. You aren't Madonna nor are you trend setting. And unless your main transportation is a horse just don't wear a cowboy hat, or you're a total poser cowboy.
6.) This one here is a no brainer and it's mainly, but not solely, directed towards the ska bands. DO NOT insert the name of your genre, or something related to your genre into your band's name. You don't see any good bands attempt this. except (Metallica, but even that is questionable) The best solution to this problem is to not start a ska band in the first place, cos not only are ska bands just itching to break this rule and prove their dorkdom, but nobody's scoring gash with a ska band anyway.
7.) Avoid using the words theory, project, or plan in the title of your band name.
8.) Don't play funk. Don't even joke about playing funk.
9.) Visors on band members (or anyone for that matter) earn yourself a bitch slap. If you have your visor sideways, upside down, or both your penalty increases to additional groin area pummeling.
10.) For shows, props are generally a bad idea. They usually stimulate the audience's what-the-hell sensors. If you do decide to use one, make sure it's small and you don't spend most of your time playing with it. Unless of course you are the Beastie Boys, it's 1986, you're opening for Madonna, and you have a giant two story penis on stage.
11.) If your band has a cozy fan base of say, five, skip out on the huge rock star banner. It is key to grasp the idea that people don't operate on the if-they-have-a-banner-they-have-to-be-good mentality.
12.) Never have all members wear the same shirt. This is a ridiculous concept and should not be explained.
13.) If you're playing your hometown, don't say "What's up (town)". This phrase is reserved for the out of town and/or touring bands. You might make them mad by stealing their pep speech.
14.) If you're playing outside of your hometown, don't say, "What's up(town)". This screams shoot me in the face.
15.) Preaching is for church, shut up and rock.
16.) Cordless guitars are only ok if your first name is Eddie, your last name is Van Halen, and you kick ass at playing guitar with a power drill. If this is not the case, don't venture there.
17.) Playing your guitar up by your neck makes you look like a geek. Period. If you need an example, take a cue from a few of the greats...look at Slash's guitar height, or maybe take a peek at where Duff let the bass rest, or possibly look at just how low Chris Novaselic rode his rock axe.
18.) If you play bass make sure you have only 4 strings. If you play guitar make sure you only have 7 or less. If you play drums know that if your set looks like something Tommy Lee would play while hanging upside down, you are a jackass. You don't need 12 cymbals fruitcake.
19.) Gold hardware and/or wood stained anything is a no-no. Ditto for neon anything.
20.) White cordless mics were used by Vanilla Ice, don't travel the same road.
21.) Unless you are an immortal rock god, spitting or throwing water into the crowd instantaneously eliminates any chance you had at getting laid that night. It may ensure you getting your ass kicked though.
22.) Covering new wave songs, oldies, or current Top 40 songs means your band sucks mad horse dong. The "hey wouldn't it be funny to cover that N'Sync song and make it punk" idea is about as funny as a knee to the crotch.
23.) If all of your songs are about how much you miss your girlfriend, do us a favor and instead of touring, stay home geek.
24.) Kick out the fat guy, he's the reason you are never gonna be big.
25.) If you're fat, kick yourself out, you're blowing it for the rest of the band.
26.) If you're a metal band, make sure that you are a metal band before you say you are a metal band. A pretty fool proof test is to ask yourself if you think Rob Halford would be into your band back in the days when Judas Priest was the shit.
27.) If you have a DJ make sure he at least has two turntables. I actually recommend no DJ, but if you gotta go there...
28.) I take that back. No DJ's. This DJ in bands shit has to stop now.
29.) Shave. Beards = blowing it.
30.) Don't wear backward baseball caps, unless you're the Beastie Boys.
31.) Use a pick. If you play slap bass you need your fingers broken.
32.) Don't tell the crowd what they can and can't do. You're not Fugazi. If you want to be a cop, get off the stage and go join the police academy champ.
33.) Unless you're the headliner you shouldn't be playing hour and a half sets, keep it short. The idea that "Hey these people don't seem to like us, maybe they just didn't like those songs, let's play some more until we play on they like" is never accurate. Get off the stage. We want to go home.
 

rx

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the funniest part is how you have to flex at everything (which I really do) ;) but I don't get the "obtain" part. is it saying that stealing aka. "obtaining" something from a store is cool?
 

Metal Ken

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rx said:
the funniest part is how you have to flex at everything (which I really do) ;) but I don't get the "obtain" part. is it saying that stealing aka. "obtaining" something from a store is cool?
To obtain simply means to 'get'. Doesnt matter if you pay for it or not. Its just saying instred of using 'get' , you use 'obtain' (to acquire)
 

Shannon

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7.) Avoid using the words theory, project, or plan in the title of your band name.

Ooops. I broke that rule. :lol:

Whatever. That list has too many damn rules anyway.
 


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