AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
If you don't have a good sense of humor this thread prop ain't for you, BUT if you do tell a joke! everyone has at least one! Let's hear it!
Jokes of the day!
- Thread starter AxRookie
- Start date
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Bandersnatch
Twit
A girl with no arms and no legs is laying on a beach. She sees a cute guy walking by and says to him "Hey guy, I've never been hugged before". The guy picks her up, hugs her, puts her down and leaves. Thinking this is her lucky day, a second cute guy walks by and she says to him "Hey guy, I've never been kissed before". So the guy picks her up, kisses her, puts her down and leaves. A third cute guy starts walking by her and she's feeling all the confidence in the world so she says to him "Hey guy, I've never been f*cked before!". So the guy picks her up, throws her in the water and says "Now you're f*cked."
I have a sense of humor, but your jokes fall incredibly flat. They're not even a "meh" or groan worthy. They're just... dull.
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Comic Sans walks into a bar. One of the locals says "We don't take kindly to your type 'round here!"
Sharknado Luau!
How about a knock knock joke? I'll start it: Knock knock. Now you say, "who's there?" Control Freak. Now you ask "Control Freak who!"
Cuttlefish Gathering!
My therapist said "Time heals all wounds," so I stabbed him in the neck. Now we wait.
Perch Orgy!!!!
Sharknado Luau!
How about a knock knock joke? I'll start it: Knock knock. Now you say, "who's there?" Control Freak. Now you ask "Control Freak who!"
Cuttlefish Gathering!
My therapist said "Time heals all wounds," so I stabbed him in the neck. Now we wait.
Perch Orgy!!!!
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MFB
Banned
Gentlemen please, there's only so many post-hardcore/mathcore bands I can be in at once, I'm not Will Swan!
KnightBrolaire
SSO's unofficial pickup tester
MFB
Banned
With beatdown in the name so help me god if you don't play slam
KnightBrolaire
SSO's unofficial pickup tester
This joke is like health care in the US - hardly anyone will get it and it's not very good anyway!
Coral Kegger!
Coral Kegger!
MFB
Banned
Me and the boys reaction when KnightBrolaire's shark themed slam album finally drops
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
There should be a double like button!
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
How do you derail a campaign?..... Test positive!
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
Trump justified his use extensive of Twiter saying he'd use it less if the press did its job, or if his Ambien did its job!
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
A video has been posted of a porn star and her boyfriend having sex in a Tesla while it was driving on autopilot, and amazingly, no one was rear-ended!
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
Did you hear about the man in North Carolina that admitted to sucking on a woman's toe's in a shopping center? he was sentenced to a month in jail where he is expected to do very well...
AxRookie
Aspiring Expert
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
Because they taste funny.
Because they taste funny.
I went to the public library the other day and asked to borrow a book about suicide. The librarian looked at me for a second, then shook his head and said "Naw, I don't think you'll bring it back."
Megalodon Mania!
Megalodon Mania!
Kaura
Je suis ketchup
Introduced my supervisor to grindcore at work today. She asked why all the songs are so short so I told her one of the classic jokes.
Go to a grindcore gig 15 minutes late and you miss the first three bands.
Go to a prog gig 15 minutes late and the first song is only halfway through.
Go to a grindcore gig 15 minutes late and you miss the first three bands.
Go to a prog gig 15 minutes late and the first song is only halfway through.
