It's because you're on the Frenchy side. The Americans will team up with the Quebecois and take over the Anglophones.
Apparently Dokken is legal now?
- Thread starter StevenC
- Start date
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We never team up with something we can't spell - or say.
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
So now we should probably try to assemble tickets out of the pool of former and current Dokken band members.
"File footage (colourised) from Jul 3rd, 2027, the day after the Ameriquebec alliance relinquished the bottom 10 provinces of Canada, when the alliance was broken due to 'irreconcilable differences'. France and England would return on Nov 11 to clear the rubble and claim the land per the original territories prior to 1867."
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
On the bright side, there has to be a limit to how much of the country they can put in internment camps before corporate profits start to dip.
DarkstarII
SS.org Regular
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2021
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Wooo! Nothing brings out the hate like MAGA winning!
(I’m surprised this thread got green-lit… bet it’s purged soon enough!)
(I’m surprised this thread got green-lit… bet it’s purged soon enough!)
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
If you think this is hate, stick around. And I don’t mean in this thread.
This is a thread about saving Canada with the dulcet tones of Dokken, DarkShart.
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
Agreed. The Dokken Party needs a Presidential ticket for the general election. We need two former or current band members who are natural-born U.S. citizens at least 35 years of age, who’ve lived in the U.S. for the last fourteen years.
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
I’m having trouble coming up with a geographically balanced ticket. Is no Dokken member from the South? We basically have west coast, Chicago, a few other midwest locales, Pennsylvania, Ohio. Gary Holland is from Syracuse.
What if none of the guys are old enough? Don Dokken is 71 and might qualify. Maybe he could go by Donald Dokken, and capitalize on voter confusion. We could court the youth vote with our VP candidate; Jeff Pilson is a sprightly 66, you know.
What if none of the guys are old enough? Don Dokken is 71 and might qualify. Maybe he could go by Donald Dokken, and capitalize on voter confusion. We could court the youth vote with our VP candidate; Jeff Pilson is a sprightly 66, you know.
wheresthefbomb
Well-Known Member
Little known history fact: Dokken was legalized on January 27 1988 when Don Dokken said to Ronald Reagan, "let my people go... to the hair salon to get big hair" and then hit a high note so immaculate that it decalcified Nancy Reagan's pituitary gland and she whispered to Ron "Just Say Yes." For this act of bravery, the mayor of Los Angeles gave them the Key to the City and declared that all of the millions of men, women, children, and small animals wrongfully incarcerated for Dokken would be set free and given a lifetime supply of Aqua Net.
Wiltonauer
SS.org Regular
There was certainly an historical precedent for that. Reagan had supported the legalization of Dokken for years. His 1984 campaign slogan “It’s morning again in America” was a reference to the band’s highly anticipated follow-up to their debut album, Breakin' the Chains. When Tooth and Nail was released to eager American voters on September 14 of that year, it truly was morning again in America — a new dawn for Don Dokken and his tight little group of itinerate musicians touring the countryside in the new summer of love.
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TedEH
Cromulent
If I know the Quebecois, they more or less hate the Americans as much as the English. Six of one, half a dozen of FREEDOM. Both are historical threats to the culture. If you showed up with Dokken, they'd be waiting at the border to fight back with Les Cowboys Fringants.
... hate us? No one hates Americans. Last I checked, we are still the coolest dudes in all history.
TedEH
Cromulent
But but but but but Francois Legault said that history began with Samuel de Champlain! Now I don't know who to believe.
tedtan
Well-Known Member
If they truly have any French in them, they’ll wave a white surrender flag and go back to eating snails and frogs before we get there.
I dunno, I gained some respect for the French in the last few years when the government was like "we think we're gonna raise the retirement age" and they were all like "le fuck that!" and turned Paris into a(n even bigger) trash dump.
When in doubt, you trust an American. Those are the rules. I think.
Vostre Roy
Disciple of Djod
If they truly have any French in them, they’ll wave a white surrender flag and go back to eating snails and frogs before we get there.
